What would you do?
 If you were divorced?
Made redundant? Your house was due to be repossessed?
You had two toddlers to look after? All in the same month?

One of the most important times in my life was when I got married in 1997. I had waited so long! It was like a dream come true. It was therefore very disappointing when five years later and with two children it ended in divorce... For a year or two I suffered in silence the emotional and then physical abuse, I prayed and hoped that things will change; instead they got worse. I lost my self esteem and confidence.

I would not look in a full length mirror as I felt useless, ugly and worthless based on the nasty things that I had allowed one individual to pollute my mind with. One night as I went to sleep I had the most amazing dream! I was a bird in a cage, and all of a sudden a hand opened the door of the cage and said in a soothing voice “you are free! Fly away,” I found myself flying high up the blue skies, the voice kept saying…”keep on flying , go as high as you can , you are free” When I woke up I started to cry as I was very overwhelmed, I then decided to file for divorce. This was not an easy decision as the consequencies during the process were at times unbearable. One day I even felt like running away with the children to a place where no one will know us so that we could start life again.

It was not an easy time for me as in that same month, I was made redundant from my job, the house was going to be reposed, I had a huge amount of debts, my ex was harassing men and I had two toddlers to look after and I just could no make ends meet. It was a very stressful time for me, I had my belief that God would help me through, My mum especially was very helpful. If it was not for my strong faith in God, I don’t think I would have been here by now. I believed that all things worked together for the good for those who believed.

I also believe that God does not give you more than you can cope with. Many times I felt overwhelmend and alone. The children and I had suffered a massive psychological wallop. They are thrown upon a parent who has to be both father and mother to them. There are times when you long to “go-off-duty” for a while. Successful single parenting requires that you map out a plan of action, verbalising your philosophy and defining your goals,

There are times when you feel utterly alone. Decisions have to be made and you know you havn’t the wisdom to make them. There is much to be done, and you have no time and energy to do it. There isn’t enough money for the necessities, let alone for even small luxuries that would delight childish hears When I sit back now I wonder how I managed to get through without breaking down; there have been times when I felt like giving up; when I felt that there was no light at the end of the tunnel. You wake up one day and feel all right, yet the next you feel as if the world is going to cave in. You project this image to the outside world that all is well, but when you are in your own house behind close doors you feel very miserable. When I look back now,

I realise that things happen in life for a reason. I realise that I kept going because of my strong faith, support from my family, friends, and choosing to use my experience to help others by training to become life coach. I could go on now and recall every bad thing in detail that happened to me; but I choose not to, as I believe that there is no point in relieving the old story. It is time for me to tell a new story, which is full of inspiration and a hope for a better future.

Today I am a strong and confident woman. I work part-time 3 days a week, I run 3 businesses, I have set up a children’s charity, I am a mentor to a number of individuals, I have time to take my children to school, do homework with them, take them to all their out of school activities and have time for myself. I feel totally blessed that I have the strength and motivation to do all this. My main goal now in life now is to be a blessing and an inspiration to others. I believe that everyone is unique and special. We all have special gifts and .abilities, which if developed will help us to maximise our potential and be the best we can.